Wedding Tactics

I have spent years being a massive control freak and not allowing others to help me.

Somehow on the morning of May 20th I was as calm and cool as the salami in the refrigerator. I woke up earlier than I had originally planned and my first thought was that I wished my rehearsal dinner had gone longer because I didn’t get to talk to everyone. Then I remembered that holyshitohmygod, today is my wedding day today is all about me and this is my day and ohmygod I’m getting married in eight hours.

In a more perfect world I would have slept until about 10:30 in the morning, had a leisurely breakfast while watching television, my choice of TiVo’d shows, of course, followed by a shower and then a seat in the hair-makeup chair at 12:30 and a quick slipping into my dress at 2pm for my initial photo shoot with Marc at 2:30.

It didn’t go that way.

My two friends were to arrive at 9:15 for their hair styling, followed by my sister in law at 11am and my mother in law at noon. I would be last, as I was, most important and needed to be the “freshest�.

I woke up at 8am.

I had breakfast. Toast, orange juice and a scrambled egg. I had nothing to read and the house with my in-laws and sister-in-law-type (they aren’t married, but I like her) had an eerie buzzing of energy, sort of like the humming of a mosquito near your ear, but it was also mostly relaxed.

My friends showed up on time.

My hair stylist arrived promptly at 9:20am to begin a style at 9:30am.

I had nothing to do but wait.

And be nervously nauseated.

I took a nap. And then waited some more. The waiting was the hard part, can ‘ya tell?

Finally, I took a shower and made my way to the hair and make-up chair. Before I knew it I was putting on my third coating of deodorant, slipping into my dress, holding my bouquet and hugging my parents while I waited to see Marc for the fist time.

The point of this long assvicey entry is that your wedding day is YOUR wedding day. You have to make it what you want it to be, and you can. You don’t have to have a wedding like your friend or like you think your Mom wants to see. Let me explain, if you need calm and quiet, demand that. Be sure to surround yourself with people who will support you in the way you need at that time. If you function better with seven bridesmaids and two mothers bouncing around the room, by all means, invite them ALL in. Make the day, especially the time before the ball really starts rolling, what you need it to be. It’s okay to be a little demanding, most likely people will just think you know what you want.

The day is yours and it will be as great as you make it.

And remember, this? Happens very fast. Try to remember as much as possible.

And also breathe.