Wedding Tactics

If you have already chosen a date for your wedding you know firsthand what a delicate little woven web it is to avoid offending people, trying to make people happy and manage to get married before the end of the decade. For all you recently engaged couples who are still “thinking it over” and “not yet settled on a date” … here are some tips, pitfalls to look out for and general complaints you can expect to hear.

The wedding over a holiday weekend debate meant that travel would be more expensive but people wouldn’t necessarily have to take as much time off from work. I thought I would feel guilty for taking someone’s intensely coveted three-day weekend. Although, in hindsight, I didn’t think much about it once the date was chosen and the invitations were in the mail. What seems huge today will be a faint memory tomorrow.

I got engaged in July, and I always knew I wanted a Fall wedding. That meant that we either had a wedding in December (yes, I know, not so much autumn anymore and also soon) … or we waited a year and a half.

I was not going to wait a year and a half.

Marc also said NO to December for that whole too soon reason. Men! If you can train for a marathon in four months; you can plan a wedding in four months.

When we finally decided where we wanted to get married, we just looked at the dates they had available and the openings began in early May. I did not want to get married on Mother’s Day or Memorial Day. May 20th was the earliest that our venue was available, so, that’s how we decided on our date.

I had friends beg me not to get married in December because they had another wedding to attend the week before, also in Florida and that would have been a lot of traveling for them.

My brother-in-law-to-be also asked me to move my wedding date, after I had put down a deposit, because his girlfriend’s sister was getting married the weekend before, and that’s just a lot of wedding-time for them. Sorry guys, you’ll get over it.

So much for my Fall wedding, or my December wedding.

We chose our date based on what was available at our venue. This was really just the beginning of the flexibility I would need to extend for wedding planning.

Picture from TheKnot.com

Just because you are having a Spring wedding doesn’t mean you have to have a pastel wedding. Pastel colors are a little muted and if you aren’t into them, don’t feel you have to use those colors just because of the Hallmark-esk association.

If you want an elegant and simple look, consider what this bride did, she had her maids wear a simple black cocktail dress that they could use again. Her flowers add the color. The dresses are shorter than most styles which alone gives the hint of warmer weather.

Dear Stacy: My fiancé and I are trying to pick the date for our wedding and I am having a slight dilemma. The church doesn’t have anything available this fall and we don’t want to wait until the fall of ‘09 so our next available option is May ‘09. I am not a huge fan of spring colors. I hate pastels. I love fall colors. Would it be tacky to use fall colors in the spring?

Colors are tricky and I feel your pain. There is a good solution to using out-of-season colors. Just because your wedding is happening in the Spring does not mean you must have Spring colors. Pastels can get a little tacky when overused, I agree.

I usually tend to answer a question of this nature with my typical attitude of it’s your wedding, do as you wish, but I will refrain because I think this is a rather relevant topic. My suggestion is this: Choose whatever colors you like, but use seasonal flowers. For examples, tulips in darker colors with the opposite being pastel roses in December. As long as your theme and colors flow, match and compliment correctly, your wedding will not look out of place.

You tell me that you like fall colors, so hypothetically, a deep red with gold accents. In the fall you might use roses and heavier fabrics and candles, to brighten up this display, I recommend the following: dark burgundy or red calla lilies and a gold candle in large hurricanes. This is of course, just a concept; I’m not too big on gold myself. Of course, there are brilliant oranges to consider in this color group too. As long as you don’t accent the table with leaves, you’ll be fine, instead, opt for the rose petals in the fall colors you like.

To avoid looking too “winter season� I would avoid mixing in greenery that would allude to a Christmassy-type design. Simple bouquets with the stems showing are not only modern but simple, elegant and timeless. Hence, the callas above, not the heavy bouquet on the left.

Also, be sure to carry your theme throughout the wedding, use your colors on your cake, on your tables, in the church, at the reception and it will be a complete image, rather than just punches of color that run the risk of looking out of season.

Tulips are in season in the Spring and they come in a large variety of colors and petal shapes which add texture, if that’s your thing. Here is a tulip bouquet that doesn’t scream FALL, at least not to me.

This tulip bouquet has a few strands of bear grass flowing from it, another timeless touch.

I’m not too familiar with uplighting, but if your reception room has solid walls, consider some uplighting to accent the colors and create a warmer room tone.

Dear Stacy,
I’m planning my wedding for either February or March of 2008. I’m confused about the colors for my wedding. What colors are acceptable for these months? I’m thinking a dark red, but since it is almost spring would that color be too dark? Also what would be complementary colors? I really don’t want to go with a dark green because it’s too Christmas-y and I’m not crazy about pink or black. What do you think?

White calla lilies, orange tulips and bear grass.

This time of year definitely isn’t clear on what colors are you should have in your wedding. This means to me that you can choose just about anything and make it work.
I know this probably isn’t helping you make a choice, but, allow me to toss out some ideas.

February-March is largely considered late winter but oftentimes spring is just around the corner. People tend to live a little ahead of the seasons, at least the retail world does, right? If you like the idea of a spring-y wedding, then go with something in pastel shades. If you like the look of a wintery wedding with lots of soft blue lighting and candles, think — winter whites and ivory, that will most definitely work too.

Certain flowers always seem to mark this time of year, tulips and daffodils. Do you like yellow and white? You don’t have to use daffodils, but the color, naturally appearing in nature can easily be mimicked in the wedding. And tulips come in many shades too.

If you like deep red but aren’t sure what to pair it with, consider a cream colored flower and a shade of purple or blue, hydrangeas, lilies and irises.

It is possible to make any color combination work, it just takes some thought. If there is one color you definitely want, build around that. A florist can help direct you towards flowers that are available in your area and during that season.

Even an all red bouquet can work - it just needs to be broken up with a litte white or alternating shade of red.

The one last thing that can help when you are at a loss for what color to choose. Think theme. For example, some summer themes can be seen here, but other themes include winter wonderland, spring blossoms, disney themed, ethnic themes, movies, and hawaiian.

wedding, colours, colors, 2008, season, tulips, bear grass, calla