Wedding Tactics

It isn’t much of a secret that traditional weddings use a lot of STUFF and are not exactly known for being earth-friendly or resourceful. But you can change that starting right here! With just a little forethought and some action plans you can make your wedding environmentally friendly, economical and create less waste.

By considering where your wedding food and decorations are coming from and making a few simple choices and changes you can help to eliminate transportation fees and added traffic. Using an on-site caterer for all of your food and beverage needs, as well as having the cake prepared on-site will take a refrigerated truck off of your local roads and you will be saving the fees associated with those deliveries.

Florists usually have delivery fees as well and they cart those gorgeous blooms around in a truck, a big ‘ole refrigerated one, which means more gas and more environmental impact. Consider negotiating with them to deliver a day or so before hand and use the refrigerator on-site to store the flowers until the event, if they are able to deliver at a less traffic-congested hour or when it is more convenient for them, they might be willing to waive delivery fees and you won’t be making any more traffic.

Weddings often give out programs which use several different kinds of paper and often ribbon too. If you put out a collection box near your gift or cake table people can return them so you can save them or dispose of them responsibly at your local recycling center. Or, just skip this step and save yourself the cost and time of preparing programs which usually just result in paper waste.

Jewish weddings usually give out personalized yarmulkes. If you take it home and lay it inside of a drawer you can have the perfect soft and contained spot for a rings or pair of earrings.

Also, consider printing your invitations on recycled paper and print on the back side a request that they be recycled.

Just by taking a few minutes to consider alternatives and other uses for items used in your wedding you can make a big impact on your local environment, and often times, your wallet.

Picture from TheKnot.com

Just because you are having a Spring wedding doesn’t mean you have to have a pastel wedding. Pastel colors are a little muted and if you aren’t into them, don’t feel you have to use those colors just because of the Hallmark-esk association.

If you want an elegant and simple look, consider what this bride did, she had her maids wear a simple black cocktail dress that they could use again. Her flowers add the color. The dresses are shorter than most styles which alone gives the hint of warmer weather.

Orchids are great for hair-flowers because they hold up extra long in hot weather and they have stems that are strong enough to get pinned into a hairdo. They are great for gals with lighter colored hair because the pale white color of the flower is subtle enough to make a statement but large enough to add a grand romantic touch.

It should be common knowledge now that the President’s daughter, Jenna is engaged to be married on May 10, 2008. In a recent issue of People magazine there was a one-page spread of the details they are choosing to publicize. So far, all we know is that the couple is planning a private, 200-person affair in Crawford, Texas.

I suppose Jenna has a soft spot in her heart for Texas. I do not. Had my father been the president and my wedding able to be held at the White House, I think I would have jumped at the chance for this one-of-a-kind venue. However, I’ll overlook our differences in venue to offer Jenna some wedding suggestions.

The best wedding themes debuting this season are green, as in, eco-conscious, eco-friendly, earthy and earth friendly. Even the simplest of “green” touches makes for a trendy wedding. Thus, I recommend for the most famous/infamous family in the nation right now, a “green” wedding. Of course, not every details needs to be free of chemicals, free of harm, free of animal testing, etc …

For starters, for the bride of the season I suggest a classy and traditional gown, appropriate for a country wedding at any time of day and well suited for Jenna’s curvy but fit body.

A silk satin, strapless, dropped waist, Gail Garrison gown with a semi-cathedral train.

A dominant color in this classical but earthy wedding is green. Subtle uses of the timeless color: green.

This Ann Taylor bridesmaid gown in meadow green is affordable and well tailored for the average woman’s body. Although it is a shorter length more typical of an afternoon or country-club wedding, the fabric is elegant enough for evening, especially when paired with heels and an up-do hairstyle.

I am usually a fan of a good splash of color but for a “green” wedding I really like the calla lily. In this photo the bouquet is paired with a few strands of bear grass. Bouquets of callas are best when the stems are left open and wrapped with a single strand of ribbon.

And finally, the sweetest part of the wedding, the cake!

The grass is handpainted on white fondant icing. For more detail on this cake, visit the website of the original baker, Sweet Melissa Patisserie.

I’ve just started hearing about a few engagements that took place around Valentine’s Day. If you are one of those people, a sincere congratulations to you!

One couple in particular is getting married at the end of the summer. A wedding, in exactly six months. I can hear the style guides and high-glam planners cringing with absolute fright. But I assure you, it is possible to have the wedding you want in six months or less. All it takes is some careful planning in the beginning and some diligent team work. By team work I am absolutely implying that if you have a mother or mother-in-law who wants to man the controls, by all means, this is the time they are needed. You really do need someone working on plans more than just on weekends.

Many vendors book up months and even years in advance so it may not be possible to have your choice of vendors. You do compromise some degree of choosiness but that doesn’t mean you have to give up on quality. Employ your friends and family to help you, you will need it for making phone calls and lining up vendors.

I have also written a detailed beauty checklist to follow leading up to your wedding. Many of these activities can be abbreviated when time is limited.

Here is an abbreviated to do list in you are planning to get married in less than six months:

Immediately:
Decide on your budget, color/theme, and make a thorough list of all the things you wish to incorporate into the wedding, include EVERYTHING, even things like newspaper announcement or embossed personalized napkins because for one it will help you decide what is really important to you, it will force you to prioritize and most importantly, delegate and ask for help. With this short of a time frame, you have to ask others, unless of course you don’t work and can spend forty plus hours a week planning your own wedding, in which case, you shouldn’t be reading my website.

Questions to ask yourself:
1. Will you hire a coordinator?
2. Will you have a separate ceremony/reception site, or will it be the same location?
3. Start looking for a gown, most likely, unless you buy off the rack or at a close-out sale, it will take a few months for the dress to be made and be shipped to you.
4. Create your guest list because this will determine what kind of venue size you need.
5. Register for gifts.

Vendors:
1. Book an officiant, NOW.
2. DJ or Band? You have a much better bet finding a DJ on shorter notice.
3. Caterer.
4. Florist.
5. Photographer.
6. Do them all now. Make phone calls and your first question needs to be: ARE YOU AVAILABLE ON MY WEDDING DATE? If they are, then talk specifics and decide if you want them.

Other important things to do:
1. Order invitations.
2. Book a honeymoon.
3. Select a cake.
4. Shop for rings.

Okay! Phew! That’s the short list of what you need to think about and do RIGHT NOW if you are getting married this summer and haven’t done anything yet.

And don’t stress too much, remember, weddings are happy times and should be FUN.

Christmas is a magical time of year for many people. No wonder so many people want to get married during the month of December. It’s a time of year when people start thinking about family and celebration and being thankful.

It can be a great time of year for a wedding. If you like the decor of dark red poinsettias, holly bushes and tiny white lights, then you can definitely take advantage of the decorations already in place at many churches, restaurants and reception halls. You can save A LOT of money by using what already exists!

Just because red and green are all over doesn’t mean you have to use those colors. Consider silver and white, silver and light blue or red and gold. Typically, the white color you see this time of year is actually a cream color.

Even if you have been planning a wedding for a different time of year, you can convert the color choices into some that will work in the winter months. Click here to see an explanation.

If you are planning a wedding for this time of year, consider sending your invitations about more than the traditional six weeks in advance, rather, opt for about ten to twelve weeks in advance because people like to plan ahead and it is a popular travel time.

If you want to have a wedding this time of year but aren’t too into the actual Christmas theme and Christmas colors, consider the season and play of the idea of snow and warmth. I love this snowflake cake.

Regardless of what kind of color theme you choose, your venue can be all the inspiration you need. Think of rustic restaurants with roaring fireplaces and exposed beams. Country inns are also great places for wintertime weddings.

When I was planning my wedding, less than a year ago, I spent hours just looking for images on the Internet to give me ideas for everything from centerpieces to hairpieces. To help you with your wedding planning, I’ve decided to create an entry consisting of photos to help give you ideas. As the seasons change, wedding colors and dress styles change, so there really are endless ideas and images to choose from. When possible, I will give as much detail about the type of flower or brand of dress that I feature. If you have questions about where I found a certain image, please email me or leave a comment and I will give you more information.

Hairstyles

I predict that 2008 will see a lot of soft low-bun hairstyles with gentle accents like flowers and beading. If you are going to put flowers in your hair, be sure to speak with a florist first and use the ones that are most likely to hold up the longest. For example, stephanotis are great flowers, their little white brilliance is perfect for bridal hair, but they wilt very quickly in sunlight and heat. Instead, use orchids, they are much more hardy.
More hairstyle info can be found by clicking here.

Placement Cards

I really like these placement cards for an afternoon beach-side wedding. While they are not the most elegant, they are cute and would go very well with a surfer/beach/ocean ish theme. You can even touch it up by using a place-card holder like a little mini Adirondack chair or a small photo frame.

Flowers
I really like this bridesmaid bouquet. First of all, I love the pink! Gerber Daisies are one of my favorite flowers. I think they are whimsical and classic — at the same time. Also, the wrapping on the stems adds a very elegant touch. Also, as a bridesmaid, it helps to have something like that ribbon to pin a few extra hair pins into. You never know when the bride might need her veil re-secured.

If you are planning a wedding in the Washington, DC metro-area, you might really love DaVinci Florist. They are affordable, friendly and very professional. They work hard to make the brides happy and they have excellent floral talent too!

I also really like that their website has extensive wedding photo galleries and lists of flower information.

Charlotte’s Flowers features silk flower arrangements. They have a very comprehensive package for less than $200!!

A … A-line skirt. Invented in the 1960s, it refers to a skirt that is slightly flared at the bottom, creating a very nice line for many body types.

B … Best Man: the term given to the head male assisting the groom in a wedding. In current times, a best man is generally responsible for planning a bachelor party, helping on the wedding day, holding the rings during the ceremony and providing friendly moral support to the groom and the couple.

C … Cut, Color, Carat, and Clarity The cour C’s of a diamond. Cut refers to the shape of the diamond, is it round, oval, pear shaped or emerald cut (rectangle). Color refers to the clearness of the diamond. Not all diamonds are alike. In fact, they are ranked on a scale of color from D to Z. But, for a ring, color usually only goes up to about a J. Anything higher and the stone will have a deeper yellowish to brown color. It is still a diamond, just not a clear diamond.

D … Diamond Engagement Ring

E … Engagement! The average first marriage engagement lasts 9-12 months and the average second marriage engagement lasts anywhere from three to six months.

F … Flowers! Most wedding ceremonies have many flowers as decorations. People use fresh, silk and dried flowers of all different colors and textures to create relaxing, romantic atmospheres for their wedding ceremonies. When it comes to choosing wedding flowers, the sky is truly the limit. You can spend as little as a few hundred to as much as thousands.

G … Guests. GUESTS. Guests can make a wedding the party that you want it to be. They give gifts and come to celebrate with you. They cost you the bulk of your wedding budget in food and alcohol and too often people decorate just to amuse the guests. Without guests, you really don’t have a wedding. It’s a catch-22. This article here talks about how to be a good guest, in a not-too-patronizing kind of way. This one here talks about what NOT to do, as a guest.

H … Honeymoon!!

I … Investment. Consider investing some of your wedding gifts so you can create a nest egg or just a small savings for household projects or future vacations.

J … Jewelery. In many cultures married people wear a wedding band as a sign that they are married. For many, this is as simple as a solid metal band made of gold, platinum, silver or titanium. Others prefer a fancier approach and their rings include diamonds and other stones. To see some modern day matching band sets, click here. And, to read about why should NOT take your ring off, ever really, but in public, click here. And read all the way to the bottom for ring cleaning instructions.

K … Kippot, or, yarmulke. In a Jewish wedding you will see the groom and all male guests wearing a head covering called a kippot.

L … Love. Don’t marry someone unless you really do love them. Marriage is not easy at times. Loving the person unconditionally will truly help in the tough times and make the good times even better.

M … Marriage. Wikipedia says marriage is an interpersonal relationship with government, social and religious recognition. Huh.

N … Nuptial. Nuptial is the adjective of Wedding. According to Wikipedia, it is used more in zoology to refer to mating season coupling, however, nuptials are also a marriage ceremony.

O … Outdoor weddings. Outside weddings are increasingly common and are a lot of fun. Usually reserved for the warm-weather months and more common in areas where the scenery is worth celebrating and can be incorporated as decoration in and of itself. Beach weddings, water-front weddings, boat-ride weddings, English-tea garden weddings are all very common wedding experiences.

P … Petals. Rose petals. Consider sprucing up your ceremony site by having rose petals line your aisle. It is a relatively inexpensive way to add some romantic detail to your ceremony site.

Q … Queen! At least you are for one day, so be sure to act like it! Remember that this is your wedding day. And you only get one. You have spent a lot of time planning and dreaming about this day, not to mention you have spent a lot of money on this day too. It is OKAY to be a little demanding and expect that people will put aside petty issues and just celebrate with you. Keep this in mind when dealing with annoying relatives and unruly vendors. You are paying the vendors to do a job for you and you have a right to expect that things be done according to plan and on time. From family members, you have a right to expect that they will put aside petty differences for a few hours for your sake. If they don’t, ask them to deal with these issues tomorrow because you would like the party to be a party.

R … Royal Doulton. Creators of china patterns and casual tableware.

S … Square Diamond.
Or, Princess Cut, as it is commonly referred to as is a very common style of engagement ring.

T … Tuxedo. Most men get married in a tuxedo. The most formal of men’s suits, tuxedos are easy and affordable to rent from a number of local and nationwide stores. Plan ahead and choose a tuxedo style and pattern about four months prior to your wedding so that all the groomsmen and fathers have time to get fitted and secure their rentals.

U … Unwind. Be sure to take some time prior to your wedding to spend some relaxing time with your family. It’s a special time and it will help you relax and focus on your big day ahead.

V … Vera Wang. Not only making dresses these days, Vera Wang has a line of household goods including china, silver and glassware.

W … Winnie Couture

X … X-tras! Be sure to keep an eye out for extras in your wedding planning. Ask all your vendors if they have seasonal specials or even reduced prices for holding your event at less popular times, like Sunday afternoons, Friday evenings and after a holiday weekend.

Y … Yolanda Couture.

Z … Zzzzz…… Sleep! Be sure to get some sleep the night before your wedding. It will help you keep going strong all day and make you feel better too. If you haven’t gotten much rest during your months spent wedding planning, be sure to plan a relaxing honeymoon where you can get plenty of rest. On a beach, in a hammock, on a boat, in the sun, in bed on a rainy afternoon …. many couples spend the first day or so of their honeymoon catching up on much needed rest.

If you are planning a Chicago-area wedding, be sure to visit the website for Elizabeth Wray Designs.

The gallery features designs separated into categories ranging from elegant and soft to whimsical, modern and natural.

There are certainly ideas here for everyone and every style of wedding. Clearly Elizabeth Wray knows the variety of brides that exist and knows how to tailor her designs accordingly. I have always found that vendors with this sort of flexibility and degree of skill are worth talking to!

Dear Stacy,
I’m planning my wedding for either February or March of 2008. I’m confused about the colors for my wedding. What colors are acceptable for these months? I’m thinking a dark red, but since it is almost spring would that color be too dark? Also what would be complementary colors? I really don’t want to go with a dark green because it’s too Christmas-y and I’m not crazy about pink or black. What do you think?

White calla lilies, orange tulips and bear grass.

This time of year definitely isn’t clear on what colors are you should have in your wedding. This means to me that you can choose just about anything and make it work.
I know this probably isn’t helping you make a choice, but, allow me to toss out some ideas.

February-March is largely considered late winter but oftentimes spring is just around the corner. People tend to live a little ahead of the seasons, at least the retail world does, right? If you like the idea of a spring-y wedding, then go with something in pastel shades. If you like the look of a wintery wedding with lots of soft blue lighting and candles, think — winter whites and ivory, that will most definitely work too.

Certain flowers always seem to mark this time of year, tulips and daffodils. Do you like yellow and white? You don’t have to use daffodils, but the color, naturally appearing in nature can easily be mimicked in the wedding. And tulips come in many shades too.

If you like deep red but aren’t sure what to pair it with, consider a cream colored flower and a shade of purple or blue, hydrangeas, lilies and irises.

It is possible to make any color combination work, it just takes some thought. If there is one color you definitely want, build around that. A florist can help direct you towards flowers that are available in your area and during that season.

Even an all red bouquet can work - it just needs to be broken up with a litte white or alternating shade of red.

The one last thing that can help when you are at a loss for what color to choose. Think theme. For example, some summer themes can be seen here, but other themes include winter wonderland, spring blossoms, disney themed, ethnic themes, movies, and hawaiian.

wedding, colours, colors, 2008, season, tulips, bear grass, calla

A loyal reader recently wrote in about not getting to the chapel in time, so to speak. She and her fiance have postponed and now rescheduled their wedding because one of them needed to have surgery. All healed and ready to walk the aisle, they are confused about how to convert their first planned early-summer wedding to a December wedding without looking very last season.

It is important to remember not to be too saddened by the loss of your Spring wedding. You can create something you love just as much and with a little thought and assistance from ME, the unofficial wedding planner.

My two favorite options for winter weddings are the snow-scape inspired drenched in winter white flowers, candles and twinkling lights, something a’la Preston Bailey, OR, take advantage of the richness and bold colors that the season naturally provides and go with darker, richer colors like purples, burgandys and dark greens. There is no rule against a pastel pink wedding in December, so if these options just don’t work for you, do what you want and it will turn out beautiful.

I browsed through many galleries to find some darker flower bouquets that I can see being the highlight of a wintertime wedding.

If you like purples and blues, consider a bouquet of purple orchids. Orchids are more readily available, read: less expensive in certain parts of the country. Try to be a little flexible with your choices, unless price is no obstacle to you.

I think this is a really earthy-looking bouquet, but from a distance, the sunflowers have a fuzzy look that makes me think of dried flowers, which we see in the fall and winter. This bouquet also uses some some bright pink roses to offset the rich browns of the sunflowers.

If your dream bouquet for your Spring-Summer wedding looked like this one below, consider carrying a bouquet that uses only some of the flowers.

Original Choice.

Alternate Option No. 1

Alternate Option No. 2

Alternate Option No.3

If you really don’t like the shades of red and purple above, consider using a deep blue color. These hydrangeas work with all seasons and you can accent them with many colors and patterns too.

Some brides are very concerned about their color palate, but I wouldn’t advise turning yourself in knots. If you choose a few colors or items that are important to you, like, for example, your bouquet, you can build the rest of the wedding around that. You can pull in greenery to your ceremony in your bouquet, or on the chairs or arch or chuppah. Just because you use elaborate flowers in your bouquet doesn’t mean your centerpieces need to match.

It is okay to have a $200 bouquet for yourself and spend $40 on your centerpieces. Just remember, candle light is an excellent and very inexpensive addition to any table. The warm glow matches any season and especially, in this case, the flame gives off a sense of warmth, a nice touch for a December wedding.

winter, wedding, preston bailey, dark reds, blue, bouquet